i declare thumb war.

I have gotten quite the number of text messages this evening. Although some were standard conversations with those whom I speak with often.. some were not. At all. The first message I received that indicated some sort of foul play was this:

• Unknown Number: Hey babe it's me. What's up?

Naturally, you assume wrong number. Correct? Yep me too.

• SLY: The ceiling. I'm afraid you may have the wrong number though.

I thought the problem was solved. However, the conversation continued. As did the stream of messages from unknown numbers. As people began to identify themselves and explain their incentive for contacting me, things started to click. It took six people awkwardly forcing conversation under 160 characters for it to dawn on me:

You figured out my password.

Allow me to continue on with the first conversation:

• Unknown Number: Is this not Stephanie?
• SLY: Yes?
• Unknown Number: Ok cool. What's up?
• SLY: Out of curiosity.. Am I to know who this is?
• Unknown Number: You told me to text you?
• SLY: That was a statement, but I still don't follow.
• Unknown Number: Facebook.....
• SLY: Yes, I have one. Who is this?
• SLY: Wait, what Stephanie are you looking for?
• Unknown Number: Yarboro. I know it's you. It sounds like you. What did you need?
• SLY: Let's pretend I don't know who you are or what you're talking about. How would you go about explaining it to me? Hypothetically, of course.
• Unknown Number: Are you messing with me?
• Unknown Number: Hello?
• Unknown Number: Steph...
• SLY: Yes.
• Unknown Number: You sent me a Facebook message with your number telling me to text you.
• SLY: What? When? And again, who?
• Unknown Number: It's David. You sent it a little bit ago.
• SLY: Hahahaha
• SLY: Shut up. Who is this for real?
• Unknown Number: Steph.. it's David.
• SLY: Wait, what!? No. I didn't send that. Wait. My Facebook?
• SLY: Are you sure?
• Unknown Number: Yeeaahh. I know it's out of the blue. I thought it was random too.

Don't worry. He kept texting. Go ahead, laugh. You won.

But like. First of all. Not only did you find out my password, but you legitimately sent Facebook messages to avoid damage control? Deleting activity and sent messages, cool. Covering your tracks, awesome. Hey, guess what? I hate you.

One, of the people that responded from who knows how many got the message, woah damn. Way to be THOROUGH. Two, a few people responded to the actual Facebook message so I got to see just how many smiley faces were necessary to pimp out my number. Three, I prefer solicitation. Four, your precious choice from Virginia gave you away. Five, I changed my password. Six, boom.

Seven? Well, I would say the war has now begun, but I would be lying. The war began three hours ago when I accidentally dropped the hint of where you would be visiting next weekend, what concert you'd be attending and what your new number is because I remember you saying you wish you had more people to go with you.

This isn't cyber-bullying anymore. This is the game of life.

Don't lose.